So, I had a job at the helium gas factory
I quit, i refused to be talked to in that tone of voice
But Y'Know what I think? I think we really need to sort out jobs here in Britain, or at least the people who do them
I went to the dentists the other day and the guy was a bloody murderer! Who else would take the tooth drill, raise it up and go
"ACCEPT THIS TOOTH SACRIFICE! ALMIGHTY SATAAAAAAAAN!!!!"
The guy was scarier than richard hammond in a demo derby!
You know who has the hardest job ever? A grand national commentator
All this garbled nonsense, but the way they announce the races is complex but awesome
"And it's swift silver on mr horsey dude on catalyst gaming coming up to the first bend!" But they say it like a sentence with random hat names in it! And so quickly
If I were a millionaire, no thanks to the corrupt a wish foundation, I would love to do one thing:
Buy a grand national horse and name it: I'm having a nervous break down
Or heck, better yet buy ALL the horses, rename them and make it sound like the commentator had gone mental!
"And they're up to the first hurdle, I'm having a nervous breakdown on my wife left me on I have an erection on my mom!
Where'd that rash come from? coming up the rear it's itching my ballsack catching up and I SHOULD BE IN A MENTAL INSTITUTE BECAUSE THE RACE HASN'T EVEN STARTED YET!!!!!!